tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2743746633913926150.post9117907601656080304..comments2024-03-12T07:00:44.143-04:00Comments on CHILDMYTHS: Divorced Parents: Does Your Child Not Want to Visit You?Jean Mercerhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14619393019771381980noreply@blogger.comBlogger10125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2743746633913926150.post-26445544971486322082016-11-23T13:33:47.125-05:002016-11-23T13:33:47.125-05:00Catching up on some of these other interesting pos...Catching up on some of these other interesting posts. Have you discussed this with your parents to find out how they dealt with that--individually? Together? That would be interesting to understand. In the case of the Pathogenic Parenting that Dr. Childress offers, as I understand it, the child would be giving reasons/explanations not to go, but acting toward the targeted parent with attitudes of arrogance, disgust, etc and basing the reasoning on "small" stuff that would be considered normal parental perogatives. The reasons would not be showing the child as a "victim" and the rest of the process would not be progressing in the Victimizer/Victim/Protector narrative. It wouldn't be simple ennui or boredom...because those can be discussed and rooted out with good co-parenting if everyone is acting authentically. I would also expect those reasons, upon examination, not get to a level of disgust.TitaniumKoahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/03114831978347809547noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2743746633913926150.post-49128074814657518132016-04-06T09:33:39.037-04:002016-04-06T09:33:39.037-04:00Thanks for kind words!Thanks for kind words!Jean Mercerhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/14619393019771381980noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2743746633913926150.post-86598184177227650262016-04-02T19:41:40.618-04:002016-04-02T19:41:40.618-04:00Thank you for this article.
OraThank you for this article.<br />OraAnonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2743746633913926150.post-23704162319199681412016-03-03T09:04:32.658-05:002016-03-03T09:04:32.658-05:00A good therapist can be a huge help in these thing...A good therapist can be a huge help in these things. My concern is about the belief that the child should be forcibly separated from the preferred parent, as a form of therapy.Jean Mercerhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/14619393019771381980noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2743746633913926150.post-45954012514776789512016-03-03T03:27:34.154-05:002016-03-03T03:27:34.154-05:00I believe my oldest boy's father was actively ...I believe my oldest boy's father was actively working to turn him against me, as evidenced by him taking me to court over and over, until the court ordered therapy for each of us, with the boy, separately (as in, I would have a session with my son and the therapist, and his father would have a separate session with my son and his therapist). This worked well and my son and I are very close now. I am trying to frame why I think this works without insulting my ex, but all I can say is that the way it looked to me was that my ex was really into control, but he couldn't control the therapist - and also, I believe the therapist was genuinely interested in my son's welfare. It was a messy part of our lives and I'm glad it's over.Priestess Padfoothttps://www.blogger.com/profile/01095135941831067033noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2743746633913926150.post-76284287549499156202016-02-28T11:48:17.897-05:002016-02-28T11:48:17.897-05:00I know of an instance of a teenage girl who, after...I know of an instance of a teenage girl who, after her parents divorced, flat out refused to live with her father and his new girlfriend. She hadn't seen her father much in the previous years the parents having been living separately long before the actual divorce. The father tried to connect again with his daughter, but it didn't work, largely because he treated her like a much younger child, and she resented that. Basically, during the years of separation, he hadn't seen her grow up. As she was nearly 18, she argued for going to live on her own, and luckily for everybody, after a tense explanation, her father agreed (and was able to financially).<br />In this case, the mother didn't get involved, because she didn't want to have the kids with her on her new life. I think the girl was disgusted with both parents, by that time.Irene Delsehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/08413578604966009939noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2743746633913926150.post-35092096316848182262016-02-23T13:06:31.459-05:002016-02-23T13:06:31.459-05:00Thanks for the example. Good thing your dad didn&#...Thanks for the example. Good thing your dad didn't have a PA advocate at hand!Jean Mercerhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/14619393019771381980noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2743746633913926150.post-53448540447484044852016-02-23T13:04:49.407-05:002016-02-23T13:04:49.407-05:00What, is it co-parenting when a child is refused c...What, is it co-parenting when a child is refused contact with a parent he wants to be with?Jean Mercerhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/14619393019771381980noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2743746633913926150.post-78221302002722998922016-02-22T14:17:15.675-05:002016-02-22T14:17:15.675-05:00I remember not wanting to go to my dad's house...I remember not wanting to go to my dad's house when I was younger. It was only because I thought it was boring there. My parents probably fretted and fussed over possible reasons: I didn't want to offend my dad by calling him boring, so opted to give no explanation. Kellyhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/07415141035634623804noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2743746633913926150.post-44455913209821908962016-02-22T12:45:00.658-05:002016-02-22T12:45:00.658-05:00Again this is why Dr. Childress work is important,...Again this is why Dr. Childress work is important, however it is also important that communication is facilitated and issues are resolved in a co-parenting environmentJameshttps://www.blogger.com/profile/05607518943576911861noreply@blogger.com